A new virus (NeMari TJ), claimed to be responsible for sudden and unprecedented illness of Indian politicians has been discovered recently.
A team of scientists, medical professionals, psychologists, social scientists, HR experts, legal experts, anthropologists, biologists, Facebookers, and housekeeping experts working non-stop for the last 3650 days has made this discovery.
Though no explanation has so far been given about keeping such a name for the virus, it is believed that NeMari stands for Neta ki biMari (Illness of the Politician). TJ stands for Tihar & other Jails, though some may think that it stands for Tihar Jail. ( PS: The reason that Tihar Jail was chosen for the name was because most housekeeping experts came from Tihar Jail, where the effect of NeMari TJ is likely to be pronounced).
The magnitude of the discovery can be gauged by the sheer fact that the team had to contain experts from such diverse fields, and had to work relentlessly for so many days.
The virus is thought to cause sudden and serious, real and virtual illness and discomfort experienced by politicians, when the probability of them spending time in courts and jails increases.
The Head of the team, Mr Pig-Bijay Ding (known to be discovering something new every week), claims that NeMari TJ was behind the recent incidents of B Ramlinga Raju, Suresh Kalmadi, A Raja, Amar Singh, and BS Yeddyurappa falling sick on being summoned by the courts.
Another unique feature of the virus is that it affects only a targeted group of individuals. Though politicians are the most affected, experts believe that NeMari TJ can also affect rich industrialists, businessmen, sports persons, and senior officials and bureaucrats among others.
NeMari TJ can lead to heart ailments, blood pressure problems, stomach problems, liver problems, headaches, sudden deafness and dumbness, bowel problems, and anxiety. The virus is so peculiar that even people who get affected by it do not know in which form will it affect them. So, often we have cases of a healthy politician suddenly complaining of headaches or blood pressure problems, which often leave Doctors attending them perplexed.
However it remains to be seen whether NeMari TJ, for which evidence has so far been collected from within India, is found elsewhere or not.
More details to follow....
(PS: Some of you wonder what Mr Pig-Bijay Ding, a politician and philosopher from Central India, was doing in the team. Be assured, he is a multi-dimensional man.)
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